There are many things I miss

On Saturday, I was serving tables at the HHP when a family that often feasts there asked me where I was from. I said, "Chicago" and thus is the reason for this post.

Back in May of 2005, when I moved to Omaha for a brief stint (about a week and a half), I posted this post and it is a GREAT list about things I will miss when I move. Well, I've moved. And I for sure miss each of those items listed.

And then, last year in May I posted this one
which included pictures of loved ones I missed terribly.(plus a long update of my happenings in MT. so scroll down if you wish to see just the pics).

And today as I am trying to write this post, those other two pretty much have it nailed. I think there is one list left in me though that's screaming to come out. It will come in words, not pictures and please forgive the words you do not understand. This post is for me and giving thanks for what once was and what is now and what will be. Lately, that's where the Trinity has me...giving thanks, being greatful, contemplating my life and the richness and fullness and where I've been, where I am and where I am going.

Words of Sybil Towner's, (one of the sharpest, wisest women I am beyond blessed to know and call my friend) keep ringing in my head. "Teach yourself to give thanks daily, Kristen. Start with 5 things a day and grow until it becomes not just a discipline."
Bless you my friend. Thank you for being a mentor and example to me!!!

**********************************************************************************************

falling to my knees I was held
by prayers and arms and lives
mirrors in a room that echo years of love
and commitment to brokeness and humanity
and life at it's best.
kids and faces that I have known, do know and know me
lights, camera, action, singing and dancing
a gym, a stage, a rooftop, a bench
mighty mighty powerful winds of change have blown through me there
and mentors
words of truth spoken in love and anger and disappointment

youth.
my youth.
stages and masks and joy
success at a level that I could handle
domination of a friendlier sort
voices guiding us on to be and become
stretching our wings and flying, falling.

adolecense, the beauty of not knowing.
a float trip turns quickly towards white water.
with knowledge comes responsibility and thank God
I wasn't alone.

sweet refrain, sustained.

floating, I'd often dive down and look and say, "what's down there?"
eyes a blaze with envy, in awe, with inspiration spilling out of every canyon,
every rock turned over, every blade of grass stepped upon.
the minutes became years and before you know it,
the valleys didn't look so deep and the mountains they didn't seem so steep
because the seed had become a plant.
and a flower. and then a seed again.

and you helped to keep my soil rich
and watered
and fed
and you, yes you, you picked rocks out of it with me until our hands were bloody.
and then you washed them for me

and remined me of who is
white as snow.
pure.
radiant.

bricks and playhouses
definition was given, granted, and stamped on our every move
control and love got confused
love and lust changed everything
blue and yellow became a green pleasant thing to look at
words
so many words were spoken, felt, breathed
a scared proud bunny rabbit without direction.
whose dreams were given kites and the north winds were blowing
such little hands though.
such big hearts
adequacy in questioned constantly
quality improvements shadowing boxes of filth
we were there.
we gave all we had.

the mountain top experiences
the pebbles along the way
the beaches and desserts and oasises and seasons
nature claiming it's rule in my life.

I weep.
I am embraced.
I mourn.
I am comforted.
I forgive.
I am forgiven.

the gift of knowing now what I didn't know then.
may it all turn to wisdom followed by action and may I forever remain...
humble.

Gracias Dios! En el nombre de Padre, Jesús y Espíritu Santo, AMEN.